The Withdrawal of Personality

Let's get serious. As serious as this blog can be. I may be way off, but whatever.

A basic fact of university life is that you start off basically on your own. Some people go to the same university as their friends, but they will be split up into different flat blocks or whatever. They could all register a flat together and stick together, but that may lower the university experience. Whether is improves it or ruins it slightly, I have no idea, but it does lower the "traditional university experience".

You start off by yourself and you meet more and more new people from Square One. Now, most people, myself included, will turn themselves, intentionally or subconsciously, into the most inoffensive version of themselves as so to make friends or whatever. The general gist is that you make friends and eventually, you make closer friends and you can become more of what you consider yourself to be or what you truly are. If they are good enough friends, or maybe compatible is the correct word, then you continue being friends. If not, then there are others. Usually.

However, what if due to the withdrawal you've succombed to, you cannot get closer for fear of people liking the withdrawn you more than the real you. Conundrum. I am using excessive repitition of words here. This is what happens when you are incapable of expressing yourself verbally. Ergh.

Now, sticking to your withdrawn persona, does your real persona change and actually become withdrawn? How long can these two separate personalities continue to co-exist? Interesting. Maybe. Pretentious. This is the dilemna I am slightly struggling with. I am probably making a mountain of a molehill and this blog is whiney and self-indulgent. Whatever. It was a good way for me to vent in a completely pretentious way.

Isn't that something we all need once in a while?