It is summer and I am not at university for a while.
Welcome to the revival of the Holiblog:
http://blogblogblogholidayblog.blogspot.com/
It's quite good so far and I will be writing on this one again. If I talked about you in the 16 posts from last year, get over it.
Saturday 18 June 2011
Plagiarism
The worst comedic offence (probably) is plagiarism. When you tell a joke that has not been written for you, by you or anyone else, it is stealing. Especially is you are getting paid at gigs, when somebody else is trying to get paid for them as well. I do not get paid, however, I have committed plagiarism, accidentally and intentionally.
Let me explain.
First: the accidental. There is small bit in my short set that briefly covers sexism (vaguely, I am not George Carlin or somebody who actually looks at social issues) and ends with the line, "I believe that fisting should be called uppercunting." A very nice pun, one of the puns that I am most proud of as it is filthy and quite cute at the same time. I came up with it after talking to my friend about boxing, a sport he is very much into. However, this line has been used by one of my favourite comedians, Bo Burnham, in his Words Words Words show and album. I was not aware of this, but it was brought to my attention after sending a clip of myself "performing" to get an open spot.
This is devastating. Some may argue that I have a right to that joke as I came up with it as well. Not many will argue that, I'm guessing. I don't even back that point, he's a world known comedian at my age, even younger, I think. Whether I came up with it or not, if I say it and then somebody hears Burnham saying it, then it will look stolen, no matter the circumstances. As I'm just starting, this would leave me dead and buried before I've even begun. Even though I love this joke and was one of them that made me feel that I could actually do comedy (along with some schtick about malaria), it's gone.
Now: The Intentional. I am not proud of this whatsoever, but due to my low confidence or self-esteem whatever, I used a segment by up-and-coming comedian Phil Wang in my set (occasionally, not always) to sort of get the audience into a good mood with a good joke, before I would use my material. My low confidence is no excuse, but I felt I needed it to actually do well. Eventually, it became a solid bit that I would do, which is utterly wrong and, yes, stealing.
Luckily, I have only been caught the once (via the aforementioned e-mail) and this has not completely destroyed my still minimal reputation. I say minimal, I mean non-existant. However, if I had entered a competition and performed either of these jokes, I would have been disqualified, something which would probably be highlighted on a widely read website such as Chortle.
Then, it would be quite posh pornography as I would be royally fucked.
Do not do what I have done, two readers. It's not on.
Once again, apologies to everyone ever. These jokes have been cut and I will continue aspiring to be a comedian. I'm working on a completely new five minutes, I'm back to the drawing board and it's exactly what I deserve.
I'm probably making this out to be slightly bigger than it is, considering I don't get paid, two people read this blog and nobody knows or knows how to pronounce my name.
However, it's therapy after receiving an e-mail. Hopefully, it will allow me to be a better writer and comedian.
We shall see. I'm not dead and buried yet.
Let me explain.
First: the accidental. There is small bit in my short set that briefly covers sexism (vaguely, I am not George Carlin or somebody who actually looks at social issues) and ends with the line, "I believe that fisting should be called uppercunting." A very nice pun, one of the puns that I am most proud of as it is filthy and quite cute at the same time. I came up with it after talking to my friend about boxing, a sport he is very much into. However, this line has been used by one of my favourite comedians, Bo Burnham, in his Words Words Words show and album. I was not aware of this, but it was brought to my attention after sending a clip of myself "performing" to get an open spot.
This is devastating. Some may argue that I have a right to that joke as I came up with it as well. Not many will argue that, I'm guessing. I don't even back that point, he's a world known comedian at my age, even younger, I think. Whether I came up with it or not, if I say it and then somebody hears Burnham saying it, then it will look stolen, no matter the circumstances. As I'm just starting, this would leave me dead and buried before I've even begun. Even though I love this joke and was one of them that made me feel that I could actually do comedy (along with some schtick about malaria), it's gone.
Now: The Intentional. I am not proud of this whatsoever, but due to my low confidence or self-esteem whatever, I used a segment by up-and-coming comedian Phil Wang in my set (occasionally, not always) to sort of get the audience into a good mood with a good joke, before I would use my material. My low confidence is no excuse, but I felt I needed it to actually do well. Eventually, it became a solid bit that I would do, which is utterly wrong and, yes, stealing.
Luckily, I have only been caught the once (via the aforementioned e-mail) and this has not completely destroyed my still minimal reputation. I say minimal, I mean non-existant. However, if I had entered a competition and performed either of these jokes, I would have been disqualified, something which would probably be highlighted on a widely read website such as Chortle.
Then, it would be quite posh pornography as I would be royally fucked.
Do not do what I have done, two readers. It's not on.
Once again, apologies to everyone ever. These jokes have been cut and I will continue aspiring to be a comedian. I'm working on a completely new five minutes, I'm back to the drawing board and it's exactly what I deserve.
I'm probably making this out to be slightly bigger than it is, considering I don't get paid, two people read this blog and nobody knows or knows how to pronounce my name.
However, it's therapy after receiving an e-mail. Hopefully, it will allow me to be a better writer and comedian.
We shall see. I'm not dead and buried yet.
Monday 6 June 2011
The Last Night
The Last Night. What was supposed to be that anyway. The night we all come together and celebrate a year gone by, with some people actually leaving for a while. They didn't drop out, just got a year abroad. Same thing, I know.
All this celebration was the plan, there was even a goodbye video for somebody leaving. It was going to be great.
Well, the best laid plans of rice and wrens often go awry.
Quite a few exams finished today so most likely people were going to go overboard. Go into excess after a long few hours of revising before a multiple choice exam. I was merely having three showers before 6pm as the heat was devestating for somebody as overweight and uncomfortable as me. It must be the gravity, it's unbearable.
Anyway, people were going to the local shitty, cheap pub before heading out into town and the plan was to show the Goodbye DVD there. Unfortunately, I couldn't make it, as I had to turn up to an Arts Societies gig to raise money for some Estonia thing. As I have learned on several occasions, these shows go on for far too long and have very little quality control. Extremely little. Not even within the societies is there any control. The Creative Writing Society is the biggest example of prentious tripe filled with "realistic" dialogue, also known as "shit" dialogue.
The best poem I have ever heard was also presented again which starts with the line, "I fucking love my grandmother, I fucking do."
Enticing.
There were many acts. The improv fell dead on their arse just as we were about to ask them for lessons on how to improvise. The Dancing Society and the Beatboxing Society were relatively good, had some skill. Better than the Creative Writing or the Improv. I noticed that the Arab House Society has failed to show up, despite beating Comedy Society to "Best New Society" at the Societies Ball. Scared to show their faces as they know I will rip their spies out from their belly button.
Or they weren't invited.
We went on far too late in the night, reception was not the best. I carried on drinking.
Eventually, I called the party people that I knew and wondered where they were in town. It was past eleven o'clock, they had to be in town for any chance of them getting to a club on time. Called up and most of them were still at the pub as the "Guest of Honour" or "The One Who's Leaving" had decided to cry and pass out after the video and a dirty pint. Selfish really. Then, there were revelations as some had indeed gone into town and only a small group had stayed behind.
Bazinga.
After rejecting friendship, I went in search of those I knew less well, but were in town. Therefore, friends. They were outside a bar nearby, but were due to be leaving soon. I walked very briskly to get there. I didn't run, can't pull it off stylishly. No way. Got to the Gothic-themed bar where everyone within a relationship was doing their best to end by fighting about something. I didn't really pay attention, it was neither my business nor interesting. Two cocktails downed, not that I had the money for them. Onto the generic club, Liquid.
I don't remember much else, except that Smirnoff Ice was very cheap that night and it was shit.
Happy New Semester or whatever.
Yeah, I lost effort midway through again. Habit.
All this celebration was the plan, there was even a goodbye video for somebody leaving. It was going to be great.
Well, the best laid plans of rice and wrens often go awry.
Quite a few exams finished today so most likely people were going to go overboard. Go into excess after a long few hours of revising before a multiple choice exam. I was merely having three showers before 6pm as the heat was devestating for somebody as overweight and uncomfortable as me. It must be the gravity, it's unbearable.
Anyway, people were going to the local shitty, cheap pub before heading out into town and the plan was to show the Goodbye DVD there. Unfortunately, I couldn't make it, as I had to turn up to an Arts Societies gig to raise money for some Estonia thing. As I have learned on several occasions, these shows go on for far too long and have very little quality control. Extremely little. Not even within the societies is there any control. The Creative Writing Society is the biggest example of prentious tripe filled with "realistic" dialogue, also known as "shit" dialogue.
The best poem I have ever heard was also presented again which starts with the line, "I fucking love my grandmother, I fucking do."
Enticing.
There were many acts. The improv fell dead on their arse just as we were about to ask them for lessons on how to improvise. The Dancing Society and the Beatboxing Society were relatively good, had some skill. Better than the Creative Writing or the Improv. I noticed that the Arab House Society has failed to show up, despite beating Comedy Society to "Best New Society" at the Societies Ball. Scared to show their faces as they know I will rip their spies out from their belly button.
Or they weren't invited.
We went on far too late in the night, reception was not the best. I carried on drinking.
Eventually, I called the party people that I knew and wondered where they were in town. It was past eleven o'clock, they had to be in town for any chance of them getting to a club on time. Called up and most of them were still at the pub as the "Guest of Honour" or "The One Who's Leaving" had decided to cry and pass out after the video and a dirty pint. Selfish really. Then, there were revelations as some had indeed gone into town and only a small group had stayed behind.
Bazinga.
After rejecting friendship, I went in search of those I knew less well, but were in town. Therefore, friends. They were outside a bar nearby, but were due to be leaving soon. I walked very briskly to get there. I didn't run, can't pull it off stylishly. No way. Got to the Gothic-themed bar where everyone within a relationship was doing their best to end by fighting about something. I didn't really pay attention, it was neither my business nor interesting. Two cocktails downed, not that I had the money for them. Onto the generic club, Liquid.
I don't remember much else, except that Smirnoff Ice was very cheap that night and it was shit.
Happy New Semester or whatever.
Yeah, I lost effort midway through again. Habit.
Thursday 2 June 2011
Becoming a Leader
Due to nobody else running, I am now the President of the Aberdeen University Comedy Society.
Wow. This is something for the CV or something more sentimental. Some sort of scrapbook.
Well, I put my name forward for the Presidency and nobody else did. At a lucklustre trial AGM (Annual General Meeting), we checked for any objections, of which there were none. Good to see I've stricken the fear of God into them. A decent vice and treasurer were also elected, both unchallenged as well. Damn, we have some apathetic people in the world.
A lot more responsibility, but nobody has told me what they are. I'm left in the dark. Everything seems to be passed on by word of mouth. Incredibly strange. We need to book a stall for Freshers' Week, but nobody has given me anything. Need to book a room for next year. Been told nothing. I must overcome this.
Inspiring.
More updates as they come. This was just for me to brag.
Wow. This is something for the CV or something more sentimental. Some sort of scrapbook.
Well, I put my name forward for the Presidency and nobody else did. At a lucklustre trial AGM (Annual General Meeting), we checked for any objections, of which there were none. Good to see I've stricken the fear of God into them. A decent vice and treasurer were also elected, both unchallenged as well. Damn, we have some apathetic people in the world.
A lot more responsibility, but nobody has told me what they are. I'm left in the dark. Everything seems to be passed on by word of mouth. Incredibly strange. We need to book a stall for Freshers' Week, but nobody has given me anything. Need to book a room for next year. Been told nothing. I must overcome this.
Inspiring.
More updates as they come. This was just for me to brag.
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